If you are one of the few that now find yourself having to choose between a sugar baby and a “real” girlfriend, consider yourself lucky. Few men are fortunate enough to have the option to choose one or the other, and you should definitely be grateful for the opportunity.
Before you go and pop the champagne however, you might want to give some thought to how tricky it is to make a decision, and the impact that each course of action will have on your life. Despite the many similarities between a sugar dating relationship and a romantic one, they are, in many ways, as different as any two types of relationships can be.
The differences between sugar dating and a “real” relationship
Consider this: sugar dating relationships basically involve providing your sugar baby with a certain amount of money in addition to certain material perks. In most such relationships, the sugar daddy would typically set up the sugar baby in an apartment or a condo, and provide for her other living and lifestyle expenses as well. In return, the sugar baby provides companionship in private or in public, and more often than not, sex and intimacy.
In a romantic relationship, these perks and privileges may be exchanged as well. But it is more common to see relationships wherein both partners share equal responsibility in maintaining the financial aspect of the relationship, which means that expenses are generally shared. Affections are also provided freely and without a tacit requirement in exchange, and both partners are generally equal within the relationship.
Obviously, not all romantic relationships are structured in the same way. There are still instances wherein the man provides for all the financial needs of the woman. Some men may also require their partners to provide care, affection, attention–and even sex–in the same manner that a sugar daddy imposes such requirements on a sugar baby. Nevertheless, in an ideal scenario, men and women have equal roles within a romantic relationship, and neither is obligated to the other in the way that sugar babies are obligated to sugar daddies.
Sugar baby versus girlfriend
That being said, let’s take a look at what having a sugar baby entails as compared to having a “real” girlfriend.
When you have a sugar baby, you will essentially be providing her with the financial support that she needs in order to enjoy a comfortable lifestyle. Sugar daddies typically pay the rent for an apartment or a condo in which the sugar baby will live for the duration of the relationship. He may also provide her with a car, as well as give her money for clothes and other expenses.
What does the sugar daddy get in return? In most sugar dating relationships, there is a tacit agreement that the sugar baby will be available for social functions or for private meetings with the sugar daddy. Depending on what is agreed upon, sex may also be part of the arrangement. In many ways therefore, a sugar dating relationship provides everything that a man would otherwise get in a romantic relationship, but without the actual emotional involvement.
With a real girlfriend, the roles and responsibilities of both partners may be similar. The man may bear the responsibility of handling the financial aspect of the relationship, although as we mentioned previously, this may be shared by both partners.
The key difference is that love and affection is typically reciprocated within a romantic relationship. No one is obliged to provide anything in return for being paid. Instead, both partners choose to love and care for each other freely and of their own volition.
Choosing between one or the other
As you may have guessed by now, each scenario has its pro and cons. For those that wish to enjoy all the superficial perks of a romantic relationship but do not wish to deal with the emotional attachment, sugar dating is the obvious choice. With a sugar baby, you can go on dates and hold hands–and even enjoy physical intimacy together–without such factors such as commitment, jealousy, and permanence entering into the picture. Although those things may be a part of a sugar dating relationship as well, most such relationships are businesslike in nature, and no one begrudges the other for not behaving in the way that partners in a romantic relationship behave.
On the other hand, a “real” girlfriend will provide you with love, affection, and intimacy at a much deeper and more personal level than any sugar baby will be able to provide. In addition, this will be given freely and without expectations of payment, which in itself is a significant factor in why many men prefer to have a “real” relationship.
To be sure, it’s not always a walk in the park. “Real” relationships can be plagued by problems that couples in a sugar dating relationship would simply laugh off. Nevertheless, the authenticity and the promise of something deeper and more significant make a romantic relationship a preferable option for some men.
The transformation of the relationship
In some cases, you may not have to choose between a sugar baby and a “real” girlfriend. Over time, the nature of the relationship may change and transform into something with more intimacy and closeness. If you and your sugar baby ‘click’, you may eventually find yourself falling for each other in ways that go beyond the attachment of a typical sugar dating couple. When that happens, you may well see the end of your sugar dating arrangement, and begin spending the rest of your time together as any ‘normal’ couple would.
Maintaining the status quo
With all that being said, there is no rule that absolutely says that you should have to wish for something more than a sugar dating relationship. For some people, such a relationship may be enough to keep them happy and satisfied–and why shouldn’t it be? If you feel that you are getting all you want out of a relationship with your sugar baby, there is no reason why you should feel that it should turn into something more.