Is your partner taking advantage of you? This is probably one of the worst things that can happen within a relationship, and sugar daddies may find themselves used or abused in some way even without realizing what is happening.
Abuse or manipulation within a sugar dating relationship can take on many forms. A sugar baby may ask for more money than you agreed on, for example, or her financial demands may become increasingly unreasonable. She may also unfairly decide to withhold certain favors or neglect to fulfill her responsibilities, even those that are part of your initial agreement.
Some sugar daddies can and do take advantage of their sugar babies as well. They may place unreasonable demands on a sugar baby in terms of the time that she makes herself available. They may expect her to perform certain acts that are objectionable or repulsive to her, or they may withhold financial support unless their sugar baby gives in to their demands.
Regardless of who is responsible or what the reason for it is, abuse or manipulation within a sugar dating relationship places unfair demands on the other partner. It can be the source of tremendous stress within the relationship, and threatens to disrupt the harmony and satisfaction that both partners would otherwise be able to enjoy.
The power dynamics inherent in a sugar dating relationship practically ensures a degree of imbalance between the sugar daddy and the sugar baby. Sugar daddies are almost always older than their sugar babies, and they are the ones paying for the care, attention, and/or services of the other. This places them in an undeniable position of power, which unfortunately many tend to abuse.
But sugar daddies are just as prone to being victimized by an abusive sugar baby. The most obvious way by which this can happen is being fleeced for additional money apart from that which is agreed upon initially. Sugar babies may ask for month money outright, or they may ramp up their demands over time, asking for more and more money than that which the sugar daddy initially agreed to pay.
Sugar babies may also claim to have sudden emergencies or an urgent financial need that comes up with increasing regularity. In such a situation, the sugar daddy may find himself having to pay out much more than he expected for any number of urgent needs.
Emotional abuse and manipulation
Being taken advantage of financially can also be accompanied by emotional abuse, manipulation, and even outright blackmail. Some sugar babies may adopt a victim mentality, even though they are the ones placing unreasonable demands on the relationship. They may withhold affection, time and attention, and even intimacy until the hapless sugar daddy gives in to their demands. This can be tremendously frustrating for sugar daddies that find themselves in this situation, and they may find themselves confused with regard to who is actually being victimized.
How you can tell
It isn’t always easy to tell that you are being abused or taken advantage of. If your partner has a strong and overbearing personality, it is way too easy to view abusive behavior as a simple quirk or personality trait. Sugar daddies that are particularly attached to a sugar baby may even make excuses for their partners’ behavior, and it can be months or years before they realize what is going on.
So how can you tell if you are getting the short end of the stick? It might help to go back to the terms of your agreement early on, paying particular attention to what you both agreed on in terms of roles and responsibilities. If you agreed on a certain amount of financial support initially, and your sugar baby is starting to make demands way in excess of that amount, that is an almost undeniable sign that you are being taken for a ride.
You might also be on the losing end of a deal if you often feel that it is you who is giving in to your sugar baby’s wishes, regardless of who is justified. If your sugar baby routinely makes unreasonable demands of you, and you feel as if you have no choice but to give in simply to avoid conflict or a tantrum, you are probably being used.
Another obvious red flag is when other people seem to be enjoying the perks that you have provided for your sugar baby. People may frequently be staying over “for the night” at the apartment that you are paying for, gifts and other purchases may disappear, and you might find yourself unwelcome host to a number of people on a night out. All these are signs that your sugar baby merely considers you a meal ticket, and you definitely don’t want to be part of such an imbalanced relationship for very long.
Clearing the air
As with many aspects of any relationship, communication is essential for clearing the air and threshing out differences. Have a good talk with your sugar baby and let her know exactly what you are feeling and thinking. Try to be calm and reasonable, and resist the temptation to be accusatory and combative. It is possible that your sugar baby isn’t doing those things that you object to intentionally, and she may even be unaware of what effect it has on you.
While you don’t want to be a partner that nags at every little thing, you definitely don’t want to wait until the situation becomes intolerable before you take action. The longer an untenable situation goes on, the more likely you are to act emotionally and hastily. In such a situation, what could have been resolved effectively could easily escalate to outright hostility, in which case the end of the relationship can’t be too far behind.
As gracious and accommodating as you may wish to be with your sugar baby, there is such a thing as going too far. Keep an eye out for the danger signs of financial and emotional abuse, and act on your best interests as soon as possible.